Thursday, November 25, 2010
Friday, November 19, 2010
Monday, November 15, 2010
Today we are back to doing school and life feels normal again. Right now the kitchen is clean, Bible time is over, kids are in their jammies, the house is settling down and becoming quiet and mommy feels great. I love this time of the evening when the kids are coloring, reading, or playing something quiet it brings true Joy to my heart. I also love the noisy times too but the quiet evenings are my favorite. I am looking forward to a great week, hope you all in blog land also have a great week.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
The past few days have been really strange lately. I am feeling a little down emotionally for some reason. I can't really put my finger on what is triggering this but I am praying it goes aways soon. I feel like all I want to do is cry. I think part of it might be that a lot of women at church have had their babies and I feel like my day is never going to come. I am even having a hard time believing that everything is o.k. with this pregnancy. I have been told everything looks great but I just can't wrap my heart around this baby. I don't know why. I feel him kicking all the time but still have doubts about having a healthy baby. I know that sounds crazy but that is really how I feel.
It also doesn't help that I have been having these weird dreams at night. One dream was that my doctor had to cut me open like a c-section and drain some fluid while I was still pregnant. This dream was really weird because after he did this he told me I would have to have a c-section to have this baby. Then last night I had this dream that my sister was pregnant. She was waiting to have a c-section and she kept telling me that it hurt really bad. I told her to stay still and I would get a nurse. When we got the back the baby was crowning and within 1 push the baby was born but was not breathing. No one did anything. All the doctors just stood there and said, "They don't worry about it until it has been 5 minutes." Bizarre, how bizarre.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Today was a wonderful day. I went to a dear friend's house and held her new baby boy in my arms for hours. It felt so good. I haven't held a baby boy since I lost Elias. This was the first one and it was absolutely wonderful. He was so tiny and perfect and he just let me hold him and look at him.
Makes me very excited for my baby to arrive. I still have a long ways to go but each day is one day closer. My ticker is almost to day 100. Thank you Lord for this special day.